The Imperfects

Do you live in fear of being found out as a fraud? That despite your years of competency, achievement and high performance someone will uncover the truth?
Well, you’re in the right place. Our resident psychologist Dr Emily Musgrove is here to tell you that your imposter syndrome is nothing to be afraid of. In fact, it’s not even a syndrome.
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To get a little bit meta, Dr Emily explains that knowing that you don’t know everything, is a good thing. Especially if you’re starting a new role, or trying something for the first time.
HOWEVER, the long-term consequences of the imposter cycle such as perfectionism, overcompensation, burnout, or even avoidance and procrastination, may impact your willingness to say yes to new opportunities, such as going for that promotion or asking for support.
In this episode, Dr Emily asks Hugh, Ryan and Josh to think about the balance of their competence and confidence, and provides them (and you!) with four practical strategies for combatting this pesky phenomenon.
And then, a weird amount of chat about Vlad the Impaler.
0:00 – An Emisode!
2:41 – Adam Grant is not an imposter
5:11 – Origins of Imposter Syndrome
6:45 – ‘Syndrome’ is the wrong word
8:19 – It all comes back to belonging
10:39 – How common is imposter syndrome?
12:20 – Fear of being found out as a fraud
15:16 – The evolutionary psychology of belonging and self-doubt
16:35 – Is self-doubt actually healthy?
17:42 – Is your confidence a mask?
18:57 – The Dunning-Kruger Effect
23:15 – The more you know ….
25:12 – Competence vs confidence
26:29 – The Imposter Cycle: anxiety, perfectionism, luck
32:09 – Becoming your own favourite artist
35:55 – Avoidance, procrastination + self-fulfilling prophecies
38:29 – Long term consequences ft. Hugh’s anus
45:26 – Authenticity as the antidote
46:22 – Less growth, less promotions
48:52 – Strategy 1: write down your skills
49:53 – Strategy 2: name your shame
51:40 – Supporting a friend with imposter phenomenon
52:29 – Self-doubt in a new role is a good sign
57:12 – Strategy 3: mentor a near peer
1:00:38 – Strategy 4: celebrate your success
1:02:57 – Creating a good workplace culture
1:04:06 – Belonging is good for business
1:06:25 – Want more on belonging?
Dr Em, thanks for joining us.
🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode
Adam Grant - The Potential of Your Potential - https://bit.ly/4jc0DFM
Dr Emily - We’re Longing for Belonging - https://bit.ly/4yElLJp
Rana Hussain - Belonging for Connection - http://bit.ly/4odhGY8
Esther Perel - It’s Not Them, It’s You - https://bit.ly/4yxgljs
🎧Things to listen to
The Curiosity Shop with Brene Brown and Adam Grant - https://bit.ly/4gT05mW
📖Things to read
Hidden Potential, by Adam Grant - https://bit.ly/4AemQcv
Hardwiring Happiness, by Rick Hanson - https://bit.ly/3T6IhM0
📺 Things to watch
Mad Men - https://bit.ly/4cLB6zx
🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop
🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop
🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects
🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects
The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

When he was 15, Andy Lee’s mum forgot who he was.
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Given only two weeks to live, Andy tells Hugh, Ryan and Josh how this news impacted his family, impacted his childhood, and continues to impact his sense of self.
And then, we’re going all the way back to the early days of Radio Karate, and Hamish & Andy.
In a long overdue conversation (recorded, of course), Ryan and Andy chat about their own friendship dynamic and why they both felt like the odd one out.
Getting down to business, Andy and Ryan discuss how a bunch of 20 year old guys made tough financial decisions while trying to remain mates, how they learnt to give constructive criticism to each other, and with the blessing of hindsight, how they feel about that time now.
Andy, we’ve been waiting for this episode longer than a baker with his oven off.
0:00 – 2 years of secret vocal coaching
4:35 – HOW long for one cartoon episode?
5:48 – When Andy met Hamish (and Ryan)
9:39 – The impact of getting cancelled after 5 episodes
10:08 – The best advice Andy received
14:07 – Jealousy, Jealousy
20:25 – The Four Way Split of Hamish & Andy
23:42 – Should we be recording this?
25:10 – Social media has replaced the paparazzo
26:11 – Andy’s nude photo scandal
30:23 – Inspiration and renegotiation
36:55 – The Vulnerabilitea House
38:02 – When your mum is given two weeks to live
40:30 – Rapid deterioration and rush to hospital
43:28 – Taking on the parent role at 15
46:04 – Furious at the new normal
49:09 – Why “Don’t Worry, It’ll Be Fine” is the worst thing to say
54:36 – Andy’s Dad’s incredible sacrifice
58:20 – The Lee Gazette
1:00:50 – Why we should talk about will’s
🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode
Ryan Shelton - Shame, Jealousy & Purpose - https://bit.ly/4A230B5
📺 Things to watch
Institute of Sayings from Real Stories - https://bit.ly/4xBJHgq
Do Not Watch This Show! - https://bit.ly/4cAwlIZ
New Zealand Spy - https://bit.ly/4hdjPBI
🎧Things to listen to
Andy Lee on Falling Upwards with Kate Langbroek - https://bit.ly/4yucp30
🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop
🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop
🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects
🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects
The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Have you ever watched the person you love most get everything you ever wanted? Did you harden around envy, or shrink with comparison? Were you able to find happiness for their success?
Philippa Northeast, Logie nominated and lead of Netflix’s My Brilliant Career, is a star quickly rising. Her most significant role? The little sister of our producer, Bridge.
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Joining us as a guest host, Producer Bridge, alongside Hugh, Josh and Ryan, discuss the years of failure and rejection behind the scenes of Pip’s overnight success.
Constantly aware of the need to prove herself a success, Philippa is completely vulnerable about the obsession that came from certain rejections, and her anxiety which manifested itself as trichotillomania.
Offering a unique and intimate perspective, both Bridge and Josh reflect on their respective siblings’ success, and how that has shaped their own identity.
It’s sibling vs sibling, and only one will make it out alive (kidding, it has a happy ending).
0:00 – Meet Producer Bridge’s Little Sister
5:43 – Pip’s Brilliant Career: From Home & Away to Netflix Star
11:39 – Middle Child Syndrome
19:28 – Sibling Comparison: Cricket and Drama Solos
20:55 – Finding Success Straight Out of High School
22:56 – Self-belief vs Self-doubt: Why Pip Took The Leap and Bridget Didn’t
25:30 – Feeling Over-shadowed, and Under Pressure
28:00 – Becoming an Unemployed Clown
29:17 – The Sensational Potter Backup Plan
34:01 – Getting Undressed (Again)
35:46 – The Hollywood Grind
37:32 – Lockdown, Isolation and Growing Doubt
46:15 – Obsession born from Rejection
51:49 – What Loneliness in the Acting Industry Feels Like
52:46 – The Body Keeps Score: Trichotillomania
54:47 – Healing: Journalling, Yoga, Grounding
57:04 – The Hallmark Offer That Changed Everything
1:03:39 – The Downside of Growing Up Next To A Rising Star
1:07:29 – Choosing Pride Over Jealousy
1:09:49 – The Upside of Losing to Claudia Karvan
🫖 Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode
Claudia Karvan - Love, Her Way - https://bit.ly/3UNr9LC
What’s Your ATAR? - https://bit.ly/4zQ4AG5
📺 Things to watch
My Brilliant Career - https://bit.ly/4zPaW8L
Family Next Door - https://bit.ly/4gEp0cw
Newsreader - https://bit.ly/3UNr4ri
A Royal Runaway Romance - https://bit.ly/3V8rGb2
Standing Up For Sunny - https://bit.ly/4xyeASP
🎧 Things to listen to
Undressed by Sombr - https://bit.ly/4wY9Ipf
🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop
🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop
🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects
🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects
The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What impact does sleep deprivation really have on your wellbeing? What about your parenting? What about your identity?
Matt D’Avella has amassed over 4 millions subscribers on YouTube undertaking 30-day wellness challenges, and promoting his minimalist lifestyle.
In life that was meticulously controlled, having kids changed everything.
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Blessed with a baby who woke every 30 minutes for the first ten months of their life, Matt chats to Hugh, Ryan and Josh about how becoming a new parent impacted every facet of his life.
Hugh and Josh share just how lonely they have felt at different times during their parenting journey, and Ryan saves the day by holding a baby for a full 40 minutes (save the applause! please!)
Matt this was a dream come true.
To watch the full episode on YouTube - https://youtu.be/foilZTRGXco
00:00 - I Tried Being Vulnerable for 30 Days
7:03 - Minimalism Maxxing
18:00 - The Vulnerabilitea House
20:25 - Becoming a father, losing sleep (and himself)
24:14 - Depression Diagnosis Wake-Up Call
32:56 - Hugh's Sleep Score
40:38 - SOS: Hiring Help, Expanding your Village
48:50 - Sleep Training: What Actually Works
52:02 - The Real Cost of Sleep Deprivation
58:29 - Being A Mum: The Additional Burden
1:01:32 - 'Do You Regret Having Kids?'
1:04:00 - The New and Improved Matt D'Ad-Avella
🫖Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode
Dr Edna Lekgabe - New Baby… New Brain… Matrescence - https://bit.ly/4zVt9Si
📺 Things to watch
Minimalism Documentary - https://bit.ly/3SSZb0t
Why I disappeared - Matt D’Avella - https://bit.ly/3SwYA4g
Matt D’Avella YouTube - https://bit.ly/4wOzFXW
💤 Things to sleep train
Tresillian Sleep Organisation - https://bit.ly/4zAGTS5
The Ferber Sleep method - https://bit.ly/4iCdqB4
Masada Sleep School - https://bit.ly/4qNi7uc
📚Things to read
Regretful Parents subreddit - https://bit.ly/4gx9W0b
🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop
🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop
🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects
🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects
The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

How does having cancer as a child impact the way you live as an adult?
Uber successful chef and restauranteur Josh Niland doesn’t do things in halves (no, literally, have you read his book The Whole Fish?).
From opening a restaurant at 26, to becoming the first Australian to win the James Beard Book of the Year award when he was just 30, Josh’s creativity came from a place of desperation to explore every opportunity presented to him.
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Diagnosed with cancer 2 days after his 8th birthday, Josh’s childhood transformed in a matter of hours into hospital hallways, chemotherapy and facing his own mortality.
In this episode, Josh joins us in the Vulnerabilitea House to talk us through an experience which profoundly changed him, which he is now grateful for.
Hugh, Ryan and Josh (our Josh), also ask about where his drive and ambitious creativity comes from, and just how close to failure Josh’s culinary career came.
We wish this chat could have gone on longer,
If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/hjZPPeKKsVA
🫖Other Imperfect’s episodes mentioned on this episode
Nathan Cavaleri - The Ups & The Blues - https://bit.ly/468HE7l
📺 Things to watch
Josh’s Australian Story - https://bit.ly/4giDtKR
📚Things to read
Saint Peter: Chapter & Verse, by Josh Niland - https://bit.ly/4bVM0SN
The Whole Fish, by Josh Niland - https://bit.ly/4bVM0SN
🍽️ Places to eat
Saint Peter - https://bit.ly/4qrs4gv
💻Things to check out
Starlight Children’s Foundation - https://bit.ly/4hHDkmM
Josh Niland’s Website - https://www.mrniland.com
🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop
🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop
🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects
🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects
The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.