ENHEARTENED with Xavier Dagba

• Ep. 16 | Mark Groves: Why you keep repeating the same relational patterns and how to stop.

  Are you caught in cycles of self-abandonment, people-pleasing, or relationships that mirror your pain? In this powerful conversation with Mark Groves, we explore what it truly means to live from your truth, even when it costs you comfort, connection, or the familiar. We talk about the physiological toll of betraying yourself, how to stop sabotaging healthy love, and the rituals that allow love to evolve. Mark shares his story of breaking off an engagement, walking away from Instagram at the peak of his influence, and how he and his now-wife rekindled their relationship through radical truth and sacred pause. We dive deep into the nervous system, anxious/avoidant patterns, cancel culture, AI, and how to cultivate self-trust in relationships that challenge us to grow. This is a transmission for anyone ready to stop sabotaging healthy love and start creating connection rooted in truth. 👇 JOIN INTEGRATE (next cohort begins June 29): https://www.xavierdagba.com/integrate-apply CONNECT WITH MARK GROVES Website: https://www.createTheLove.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/createthelove Substack: https://humaning.substack.com Podcast: The Mark Groves Podcast EXPLORE XAVIER'S WORLD: → Newsletter: https://newsletter.xavierdagba.com → Website: https://www.xavierdagba.com → Membership: https://www.xavierdagba.com/elp-unleashed → Podcast on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6sxXNMfsN9FnK34glRnkFC → Podcast on Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/enheartened-with-xavier-dagba/id1798866363 CHAPTERS 0:00 - Intro: The Cost of Self-Betrayal 0:43 - Welcome and why truth matters in love 3:01 - Speaking truth in family & systems 5:03 - Being the truth-teller in your family 7:05 - Spine and heart: the archetypes of safety 10:08 - Mark’s personal story of breaking patterns 14:35 - Leaving social media and reclaiming power 18:00 - How notifications stress the nervous system 21:00 - Social media, self-abandonment & sickness 24:00 - The trait of truth-telling no matter the cost 27:00 - The spiritual price of betraying your knowing 31:00 - Rekindling love after rupture with Kylie 35:56 - The power of a conscious closing ceremony 39:00 - Rituals that transform endings into beginnings 46:01 - Relationship 2.0: starting fresh, together 49:00 - Trust, uncertainty & anxious attachment 53:00 - Mutuality and the power of saying no more 59:00 - Possession by the wound & interrupting patterns 1:04:10 - Why rupture can build deeper intimacy 1:10:13 - Upgrading our collective conflict IQ 1:12:00 - The Four Horsemen of Relationship Breakdown 1:19:09 - The rise of artificial connection 1:27:00 - Are we burned out from too much connection? 1:29:20 - Mark’s sacred scar of gold: premature birth 1:36:12 - What part of you are you still learning to love? #MarkGroves #XavierDagba #INTEGRATE #SelfLiberation #RelationalHealing #AnxiousAttachment #AvoidantAttachment #EnheartenedPodcast #EmotionalHealing #RelationshipRepair #PersonalGrowth #ShadowWork

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• Ep. 15 | Xavier Dagba: The Golden Shadow: Before You Can Shine, You Must Claim This First

  What if the light you crave to embody, the power, visibility, and magnetism you long to live, are all hiding in the very place you’ve been taught to fear: your own shadow? In this potent solo podcast episode, Xavier Dagba unpacks the concept of the golden shadow: the radiant parts of ourselves that we unconsciously repress due to fear, trauma, and emotional conditioning. You’ll learn how to recognize your golden shadow through the mirrors of envy and admiration, how self-sabotage is often a love letter from a fearful self, and why integration (not just inspiration) is the true path to sustainable brightness. This is an invitation to stop romanticizing light and start embodying it. But first… you must claim what you’ve buried. 🧭 Chapters 0:00 – The Light You Repress Still Waits 0:33 – Welcome: Integration, Brightness & the Golden Shadow 1:30 – Why We Fear the Consequences of Our Light 3:00 – When Brightness Festers: Existential Grief 5:00 – Integration: The Bridge Between Inspiration and Embodiment 7:15 – Gold Mixed With Dirt: A Miner’s Metaphor 8:36 – Unsustainable Fire: What Unintegrated Light Does 9:52 – Brightness Requires a Descent Into Shadow 10:55 – When Your Inner Critic Turns Light Into a Tyrant 12:22 – Divine Rebellion: Stop Using Your Light Against Yourself 13:17 – What the Golden Shadow Really Is 14:43 – Repression as the First Self-Abandonment 16:00 – Family Systems, Religious Messaging, and Fear of Pride 17:00 – Somatic Prompts to Uncover Repression 18:01 – You're Not Afraid of Your Light—You're Afraid of the Cost 20:00 – The Saboteur as an Archetypal Love Letter 22:00 – What Your Self-Sabotage Is Really Pointing To 24:30 – What Would I Lose If I Succeeded? 26:40 – Discovering Your Golden Shadow Through Projections 28:00 – Admiration, Envy & Archetypal Mirrors of Your Light 32:40 – Archetypes, Movies & Externalized Longing 34:14 – Collapsing the Distance Between You and Your Power 36:00 – Why Brightness Feels Unsafe: The 6 Core Fears 38:20 – Spiritual Stamina & Building Inner Safety 41:00 – Your Light Is an Initiation 43:00 – You Don’t Need to Force Your Light—You Need to Integrate 44:30 – A Somatic Check-In: What Part of You Still Feels Unsafe? 🌱 Ready to Integrate Your Light? If this episode speaks to you, you're invited to join the next cohort of INTEGRATE—Xavier’s 4-month transformational journey to help you reclaim repressed gifts, dissolve inner fragmentation, and live, love, and serve from an unleashed heart. ** Next cohort begins: June 29, 2025 ** Apply or learn more here: https://www.xavierdagba.com/integrate-apply INTEGRATE is for those ready to stop hiding, start healing, and embody the fullness of their soul's power. 🔔 Stay Connected 📝 Subscribe to the Enheartened Newsletter for weekly transmissions: https://newsletter.xavierdagba.com 🎙 Listen to more episodes of ENHEARTENED: Spotify → https://open.spotify.com/show/6sxXNMfsN9FnK34glRnkFC Apple → https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/enheartened-with-xavier-dagba/id1798866363 🧠 Instagram: https://instagram.com/xavier.dagba 💌 Inquiries & collaborations: [email protected] #GoldenShadow #ShadowWork #IntegrationWork #SelfLiberation #ReclaimYourLight #InnerHealing #EmbodyYourLight #SpiritualIntegration #OwnYourBrightness #SoulExpression

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• Ep. 14 | Dan McLintock: The hidden force controlling your emotions - and how to find true inner peace

  In this raw and revelatory conversation, Xavier Dagba welcomes Dan McLintock, co-founder of the Kiloby Inquiries, for a powerful deep dive into the hidden force controlling your emotions: emotional repression. Dan opens up about his personal journey as a lifelong anger repressor — from childhood trauma and chronic self-doubt to addiction and disconnection — and how reclaiming his full emotional range transformed his life. Together, Xavier and Dan unpack the difference between anger and aggression, how repression drives suffering, and why most nervous system regulation techniques only soothe symptoms without addressing the buried emotional roots. Whether you tend to repress anger or vulnerability, this episode will help you uncover the unconscious stories running your life and show you how to work with your repression rather than against it. Here is what you’ll learn in this conversation: Why emotional repression is the true cause of inner chaos How “being good” is often a trauma response The key difference between clean anger and violent outbursts How to somatically test your dominant repression Tools to dissolve shame, self-doubt, and addiction Why peace is found through permission, not perfection And how to reclaim your power without becoming the very thing you feared ⏱ CHAPTERS 00:00 – The buried emotions that drive suffering 01:01 – The epidemic of emotional repression 02:06 – Dan’s experience as an anger repressor 03:33 – How beliefs and programming trap us in confusion 06:00 – Childhood roots: “I have to be good” 08:49 – Becoming the nice guy & disowning anger 10:19 – Addiction and deficiency stories 11:20 – “I think I might be angry” — the beginning of his healing 12:04 – Developing the repression work with Scott Kiloby 13:18 – How repression expresses as sarcasm, ghosting, people-pleasing 15:23 – Anger repression vs vulnerability repression 18:19 – How to tell which one you carry 20:16 – How expressing anger changed Dan’s relationships 22:20 – How Dan’s relationship with his parents evolved 26:00 – The moment Dan told his parents he was furious 28:11 – Baby steps toward healthy expression 29:29 – The embodied power of a true “no” 30:51 – Cleaning anger from the rageful edge 33:20 – The power of counterintuitive permission statements 35:37 – Spiritual bypassing as a form of repression 37:00 – The messiness of healing repression 39:25 – Reclaiming the part of you that agreed not to be like “them” 44:36 – Tools for somatic testing and reverse inquiry 48:45 – When regulation becomes sedation 51:02 – The fear of emotional overwhelm 54:26 – Why affirming repression often works better than resisting it 58:35 – “I have to suffer” – how unconscious beliefs feed anxiety 1:00:04 – How repression mechanisms behave like an illusionist 1:01:00 – Addiction as emotional regulation 1:04:11 – Shame, sobriety, and letting go of self-punishment 1:07:58 – How shame perpetuates the cycle 1:08:57 – When drinking becomes as neutral as eating broccoli 1:09:48 – Spiritual fallacies and weaponized virtue 1:11:00 – Dan on what he’s still learning to love 1:15:08 – Scars of Gold: transforming self-doubt into trust 1:20:00 – Where to find Dan 1:21:18 – Final wisdom: your back is never against the wall Connect with Dan McLintock Website: www.Kiloby.com/dan Instagram: @dan.mclintock YouTube: @danmclintock1980 TikTok: @dan.mclintock Listen to ENHEARTENED with Xavier Dagba on: Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6sxXNMfsN9FnK34glRnkFC Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/enheartened-with-xavier-dagba/id1798866363 Join Xavier’s newsletter: https://newsletter.xavierdagba.com/ Explore The Embodied Light Project: https://www.xavierdagba.com/elp-unleashed #EmotionalRepression #ShadowWork #KilobyInquiries #SelfHealing #AddictionRecovery #SomaticHealing #TraumaHealing #CleanAnger #SpiritualBypassing #ReverseInquiry #HeartCenteredLiving #InnerPeace #ReclaimYourPower #NervousSystem #EmotionalLiberation #EnheartenedPodcast #XavierDagba #DanMcLintock

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• Ep. 13 | Christopher August: Unlock the Divine Intelligence Hidden in Your Breath

  In this episode of ENHEARTENED, I sit down with Christopher August. We explore the breath not just as a physical function, but as a sacred portal into divine intelligence, emotional alchemy, and true inner freedom. Christopher shares the raw details of his near-death experience on the Zambezi River, how it awakened him to the power of the breath, and how healing his father wound opened the door to deeper devotion, truth, and service. This is a deeply soulful conversation about shame, spiritual masculinity, emotional release, and prosperity as a breath-based frequency. Whether you’re a breathwork skeptic or a devoted practitioner, this episode will expand your understanding of what’s possible when you learn to breathe fully, consciously, and courageously. We explore: How breathwork helps heal shame, repression, and masculine wounds The link between breath and abundance What it means to live a breath-centered life How to trust life like you trust your next inhale The spiritual intelligence encoded in every breath you take Learn more about Christopher: Website: https://www.christopheraugust.co Beats & Breath App: https://www.beatsandbreath.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/christopher_august If this episode resonated, please like, subscribe, and leave a review to help the show. 🎧 Listen to more episodes: Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6sxXNMfsN9FnK34glRnkFC Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/enheartened-with-xavier-dagba/id1798866363 Chapters: 00:00 – Welcome: The breath as a sacred teacher 01:37 – Who is Christopher August? Devotion, leadership, and embodiment 06:15 – Seeking external validation vs. inner worth 09:50 – The father wound and the drive to “make it” 13:00 – Estrangement, step-parent dynamics & ancestral trauma 15:57 – Ayahuasca vision: Seeing his father’s hidden pain 18:45 – The impact of fatherlessness on the young psyche 20:50 – A spiritual spark: Receiving Many Lives, Many Masters 22:41 – Africa as a rite of passage: Living close to the earth 26:15 – Drowning on the Zambezi: Death, rebirth & the breath 30:00 – What dying taught him about trust and divine peace 32:11 – Is your breath a conscious being? 33:48 – For the skeptics: What breathwork actually does 35:00 – Guided breath practice: 10 deep rhythmic breaths 39:15 – Emotional release through the breath 43:15 – Trauma, the nervous system & how the breath heals 47:00 – Masculinity & constriction: Why men need breathwork 52:00 – Breath as abundance: Receiving starts with breathing 55:00 – A practice for prosperity through breath 58:10 – The breath-money ritual: Breathing in wealth 1:03:00 – The unconscious trust between exhale and inhale 1:08:30 – The void: Breathing into nothing, creating everything 1:10:00 – Living a breath-centered life 1:14:00 – Shame as a scar of gold 1:22:00 – Breath and truth: Returning to divine presence #Breathwork #DivineIntelligence #ChristopherAugust #ENHEARTENED #SpiritualHealing #ShadowWork #Masculinity #SomaticHealing #TraumaRelease #SpiritualPodcast

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• Ep. 12 | Aaron Abke: Christianity Erased the true message of Jesus

  In this episode of ENHEARTENED, I’m joined by Aaron Abke, a former pastor and theological truth-seeker who has spent years unlearning, relearning, and reclaiming the mystical essence of Jesus’ teachings. Together, we traverse some of the most sensitive and illuminating terrain: What was the original message of Jesus? What parts were co-opted by empire, doctrine, or fear? Why are so many spiritual seekers estranged from their own sense of worthiness before the Divine? We talk repentance, ego death, Paul’s legacy, the Gospel of Thomas, New Age projections, persecution in the digital age, and what it actually means to walk the Jesus Way, with an open heart, a clear mind, and a soul rooted in love. This is a sacred reclamation. For anyone who’s ever felt betrayed by religion but still yearns for communion with God. This one is for you. Aaron’s insights are deep, disarming, and revelatory. Tune in. Find Aaron’s Work Here: Website: https://www.aaronabke.com The Jesus Way Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/@aaronabke 4D University: https://www.4duniversity.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/aaronabke YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/aaronabke Chapters: 0:00 – Aaron on the devotion to truth 2:00 – Why ego cannot survive radical honesty 6:15 – Before and after living as a devotee of truth 8:00 – On persecution, projection, and spiritual maturity 15:00 – The real story behind Aaron’s debate with Wes 25:00 – Was Jesus misunderstood by modern Christianity? 30:00 – The lost Gospel of Thomas and Jesus as mystic 38:00 – Pagan influence on Christian dogma 45:00 – The role of Paul: genius or hijacked messenger? 57:00 – Near-death experiences and the truth about divine judgment 1:11:00 – Reframing sin, forgiveness, and the cross 1:27:00 – How trauma shaped Paul’s legacy 1:39:00 – Would Jesus be labeled New Age today? 1:51:00 – How to de-dogmatize and live The Jesus Way 2:03:00 – Aaron’s scars of gold and the cost of awakening 2:15:00 – What it means to live an Enheartened life 2:26:00 – Closing blessings If this conversation moved you, please leave a review, share with a friend, and subscribe. Explore more: ➤ Join The Embodied Light Project: https://www.xavierdagba.com/elp-unleashed ➤ Newsletter: https://newsletter.xavierdagba.com ➤ Listen on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6sxXNMfsN9FnK34glRnkFC ➤ Listen on Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/enheartened-with-xavier-dagba/id1798866363 #JesusWay #AaronAbke #SpiritualAwakening #ReligiousDeconstruction #ChristConsciousness #HeartCenteredLiving #MysticalJesus #LawOfOne #SpiritualHealing #ChristianMysticism #ForgivenessWork #ShadowIntegration #DeconstructionJourney #NewAgeChristianity #TheEnheartenedPodcast

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