Sexology

How much do hormones affect your sex drive during perimenopause and menopause, and can you get your desire back?

In Episode 515 of the Sexology Podcast, Dr. Nazanin Moali speaks with functional medicine practitioner and Doctor of Pharmacy Dr. Meg Mill about low libido in midlife and why hormones are only one part of the story.
Changes in estrogen and other hormones can affect vaginal comfort, sleep, mood, arousal, and sexual interest. But desire can also be influenced by chronic stress, exhaustion, pain during sex, medications, relationship dynamics, body image, nutrition, and the thoughts you have about yourself and your sexuality.
Dr. Meg explains how spending years in a high-stress state can affect sleep, energy, digestion, and the ability to transition from managing daily responsibilities into sexual arousal. She also discusses why restrictive dieting and eating too little during midlife may leave women feeling depleted rather than more connected to their bodies.
You will learn how negative self-talk can reinforce disconnection from desire, how Dr. Meg’s 7-Second Switch can interrupt an unhelpful thought pattern, and why calming the nervous system before sex may be more useful than expecting desire to appear on command.
Dr. Meg and Dr. Moali also discuss what to review with a qualified health care professional when libido changes, why hormone testing should be individualized, and how women can approach midlife as an opportunity to rediscover their bodies rather than as the end of their sexuality.
IN THIS EPISODE, YOU WILL LEARN:
• Why low libido in perimenopause is not only about hormones
• How hormonal changes can affect comfort, sleep, arousal, and desire
• Why chronic stress can interfere with sexual interest
• How negative self-talk affects body image and desire
• How to conduct a daily self-talk audit
• How Dr. Meg’s 7-Second Switch reframes unhelpful thoughts
• Why restrictive dieting can leave women feeling depleted
• Nutrition habits that support energy and overall health
• How to calm your nervous system before intimacy
• What symptoms to discuss with a health care professional
• Why hormone testing should be based on your individual symptoms
• Why pain, medications, sleep, and relationship factors matter
• How to rediscover pleasure and desire during midlife
• Why a strong health foundation matters before choosing treatment
ABOUT DR. MEG MILL
Dr. Meg Mill, PharmD, is a certified functional medicine practitioner, founder of the Women’s Functional Health Institute, TEDx speaker, and host of the A Little Bit Healthier podcast.
After working as a pharmacist, Dr. Meg shifted her focus toward helping women explore the possible contributors to persistent symptoms and changes in their well-being. She has worked with women around the world and also trains practitioners in women’s functional health.
She is the creator of the 7-Second Switch, a brief reframing tool designed to help people interrupt unhelpful thought patterns and choose a more supportive response.
LEARN MORE ABOUT DR. MEG MILL:
https://7secondswitch.com
DOWNLOAD A WOMAN’S GUIDE TO REVIVING SEX DRIVE:
https://oasis2care.com/how-to-increase-your-libido

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What are the best sex positions for pleasure, comfort, and connection? The answer depends less on mastering a complicated position and more on finding the right angle, support, stimulation, and level of control for your body.
In Episode 514 of the Sexology Podcast, Dr. Nazanin Moali speaks with Nikki, the Sex Coach, about why there is no universally perfect sex position and how small adjustments can make familiar positions feel significantly better.
Nikki explains how anatomy, penis or toy size, body shape, mobility, energy level, and personal preferences all influence which positions feel pleasurable. You will learn how pillows, wedges, angle changes, slower movements, and supportive surfaces can reduce strain and help partners remain connected without becoming exhausted.
The conversation also explores sex positions that leave room for clitoral stimulation, ways to control penetration depth, and why rocking or grinding may feel better than repetitive thrusting. Nikki shares practical ideas for adapting familiar positions, making oral sex more comfortable, communicating during penetration, and introducing sensation play without pressure.
Rather than chasing the most impressive position or trying to orgasm simultaneously, Nikki encourages couples to focus on comfort, feedback, curiosity, and what their bodies actually enjoy.
IN THIS EPISODE, YOU WILL LEARN:
• Why there is no universally best sex position
• How anatomy influences which positions feel good
• How penis or toy size can affect angle and depth
• How to make sex more comfortable for larger bodies
• Ways to adapt positions for limited mobility or fatigue
• How pillows and wedges can improve support and alignment
• Which position features make clitoral stimulation easier
• Why rocking and grinding may feel better than thrusting
• How to control penetration depth through positioning and feedback
• How to rethink familiar positions and oral sex
• Why simultaneous orgasm should not be the goal
• How eye contact and communication support connection
• How to introduce sensation play at a comfortable pace
ABOUT NIKKI, THE SEX COACH
Nikki, the Sex Coach, is a sex, intimacy, and relationship coach, founder of The Pleasure Practice, and creator of The Connection Coach, a privacy-focused, AI-powered intimacy coaching platform.
She is a certified life coach, licensed massage therapist, psychology student, and lifelong student of philosophy and evolutionary biology. Nikki brings a multidisciplinary perspective to human sexuality by integrating psychology, neuroscience, body awareness, and the complexities of human connection.
Her work helps individuals and couples develop greater sexual confidence, communicate about desire, and approach intimacy with more curiosity, self-awareness, and confidence.
LEARN MORE ABOUT NIKKI:
https://www.nikkithesexcoach.com/sexology
DOWNLOAD 101 WAYS TO KEEP YOUR RELATIONSHIP HOT:
https://sexologypodcast.com/subscribe/
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Can sex create an altered state of consciousness without psychedelic substances? For some people, deeply present sexual experiences can involve changes in time perception, heightened sensory awareness, a softened sense of self, emotional release, and an intense feeling of connection.
In Episode 513 of the Sexology Podcast, Dr. Nazanin Moali speaks with AASECT-certified sex therapist and psychedelic therapist Dori Lewis about why sex can sometimes feel psychedelic and how mindfulness, ritual, safety, and intentional touch may deepen pleasure and intimacy.
This conversation is not about having sex while using psychedelic substances. Instead, Dori explores how sexual experiences themselves can produce shifts in awareness that may feel expansive, transcendent, or transformative.
Dori and Dr. Moali discuss why performance-focused sex can prevent people from accessing these deeper experiences. When your attention is focused on whether you are attractive enough, aroused enough, or performing correctly, it becomes harder to notice subtle sensations and remain connected to your body.
You will also learn how slowing down, creating intentional rituals, practicing nonsexual touch, and communicating boundaries can support a greater sense of safety and connection. Dori explains why consent, nervous system regulation, and emotional trust are essential when exploring intense or vulnerable experiences.
IN THIS EPISODE, YOU WILL LEARN:
• What an altered state of consciousness during sex can feel like
• Why some sexual experiences may feel psychedelic
• How mindfulness can deepen sexual pleasure
• Why sensory awareness matters during intimacy
• How performance pressure disconnects you from your body
• How to create rituals for sexual connection
• Why safety, boundaries, and consent support surrender
• How parenthood can affect nervous system regulation and intimacy
• How to communicate your needs and receive pleasure
• How somatic practices may support embodied awareness
• Why trauma-informed care matters during intense experiences
• How nonsexual touch can help partners reconnect
• How sex and psychedelic experiences may overlap and differ
COMMON QUESTIONS ANSWERED:
CAN SEX CREATE AN ALTERED STATE OF CONSCIOUSNESS?
Some people experience changes in their perception of time, sensory intensity, self-awareness, emotional openness, or connection during sex. These experiences can feel different from ordinary waking awareness, although they are not necessarily identical to substance-induced psychedelic states.
WHY CAN SEX SOMETIMES FEEL PSYCHEDELIC?
Intense sensory focus, emotional vulnerability, rhythmic movement, changes in breathing, pleasure, and a temporary reduction in self-monitoring may contribute to experiences that feel expansive or transcendent.
DO YOU NEED PSYCHEDELIC SUBSTANCES TO HAVE THIS EXPERIENCE?
No. This episode explores altered states that may occur through sexual connection, mindfulness, ritual, sensory awareness, and intentional touch without using psychedelic substances.
HOW CAN MINDFULNESS DEEPEN SEXUAL EXPERIENCES?
Mindfulness can help you notice physical sensations, emotions, boundaries, and shifts in arousal without immediately judging them. This may reduce performance pressure and make it easier to remain present.
ABOUT DORI LEWIS
Dori Lewis, MA, MEd, LPC-S, is the co-founder of Elemental Psychedelics and owner of Reflective Healing, a psychotherapy practice in Fort Collins, Colorado. She is a licensed professional counselor, psychedelic therapist, and AASECT-certified sex therapist.
Dori has spent more than a decade working in transpersonal and depth-oriented approaches and has supported hundreds of ketamine and psilocybin therapy sessions. She also trains psychedelic practitioners and works at the intersection of sexuality, embodiment, and altered consciousness.
LEARN MORE ABOUT DORI LEWIS:
https://www.reflectivehealing.com/
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https://nazanin-moali.mykajabi.com/opt-in

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Why can’t you orgasm, even when you know what feels good? Pressure, anxiety, shame, distraction, and the feeling that you must reach orgasm can make it harder to stay present and experience pleasure.
In Episode 512 of the Sexology Podcast, Dr. Nazanin Moali speaks with consulting hypnotist and somatic coach Melinda Love about difficulty reaching orgasm, getting out of your head during sex, and developing a more connected relationship with your body and pleasure.
Melinda explains why wanting an orgasm too badly can turn sex into a performance. When your attention shifts toward monitoring your progress, worrying about your partner, or wondering whether you are taking too long, it becomes difficult to remain connected to arousal and pleasurable sensations.
You will learn why orgasm is not simply an automatic physical response, how sexual shame and negative beliefs can interfere with pleasure, and why removing orgasm as the sole goal of sex may actually make orgasm more accessible. Melinda also discusses self-exploration, clitoral stimulation, responsive desire, nervous system safety, breathwork, and embodied practices that can help you become more present during sex.
IN THIS EPISODE, YOU WILL LEARN:
• Why you may have difficulty reaching orgasm
• What an orgasm can feel like in the body
• Why trying too hard to orgasm can make it more difficult
• How performance anxiety interferes with sexual pleasure
• How to get out of your head during sex
• Why self-exploration is important for discovering what feels good
• How sexual arousal and orgasmic skills can develop over time
• How shame and negative sexual beliefs affect pleasure
• How partners can unintentionally create orgasm pressure
• Why clitoral stimulation is important for many women
• How responsive desire affects arousal
• How breathwork and body awareness can support sexual presence
• How to reduce distraction during sex
• Why pleasure does not have to end with orgasm
COMMON QUESTIONS ANSWERED:
Why can’t I orgasm even when sex feels good?
Pleasure and orgasm are related, but they are not identical. You can enjoy sexual stimulation while anxiety, distraction, pressure, shame, medication effects, relationship dynamics, or difficulty staying present interfere with orgasm.
Can trying too hard to orgasm prevent it?
Yes, orgasm pressure can shift your attention away from pleasurable sensations and toward self-monitoring. Instead of experiencing the moment, you may begin evaluating whether you are aroused enough, taking too long, or disappointing your partner.
How can I get out of my head during sex?
Slowing down, noticing physical sensations, communicating what feels good, reducing goal-focused pressure, and practicing self-exploration may help you feel more present and connected to your body.
ABOUT MELINDA LOVE
Melinda Love is a consulting hypnotist, somatic coach, and host of the Embodied Magic podcast. Her work helps women reconnect with their bodies, desires, and capacity for pleasure through hypnosis, nervous system regulation, breathwork, and embodied practices.
Drawing from extensive training in somatic coaching, sexuality, breathwork, and body-based healing, Melinda specializes in helping women move out of self-monitoring and into embodied pleasure. Her work focuses on orgasmic surrender, sexual self-trust, and freedom from shame.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MELINDA LOVE:
http://www.melindalovecoach.com/podcast
DOWNLOAD THE FREE PLEASURE MENU:
https://sexologypodcast.com/subscribe/

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How do you turn your wife on without making sex feel pressured? In long-term relationships, desire often grows through anticipation, playful flirting, emotional connection, and affection that does not automatically become a request for sex.
In this episode, Dr. Nazanin Moali is joined by Marni Kinrys, founder of The Wing Girl Method, to discuss how flirting and slow seduction can help couples rebuild attraction and escape the roommate dynamic.
Marni explains why moving too quickly into overtly sexual behavior can have the opposite effect, especially when stress, responsibilities, and emotional disconnection make it difficult to transition into a sexual mindset. She shares ways to build desire throughout the day, help your partner feel seen, listen without immediately trying to fix things, and bring playfulness back into your relationship.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
• How to turn your wife on without creating sexual pressure
• Why flirting matters in long-term relationships
• How to build desire and anticipation throughout the day
• Why affection can feel transactional when it always leads to sex
• What slow seduction looks like in everyday life
• How listening without fixing can strengthen connection
• Why feeling seen can support emotional and sexual intimacy
• How couples fall into the roommate dynamic
• How pursuer-withdrawer patterns affect desire
• Ways to bring curiosity and playfulness back to sex
Free Pleasure Menu: https://sexologypodcast.com/subscribe/
About Marni Kinrys:
Marni Kinrys is the founder of The Wing Girl Method, host of the Turn Her On podcast, and creator of the F-Formula. She is a dating and relationship coach who has spent more than a decade helping men improve their confidence, communication, flirting, and relationships.
Her online content has generated more than 150 million YouTube views, and her channel, Marni Your Personal Wing Girl, has more than 1.3 million subscribers.
Get Marni’s Flirting Cheat Sheet:
https://winggirlmethod.com/flirtcs
About Dr. Nazanin Moali:
Dr. Nazanin Moali is a licensed psychologist, AASECT-certified sex therapist, and host of the Sexology Podcast. She provides sex and relationship therapy in Hermosa Beach, the South Bay of Los Angeles, and online throughout California.
Work with Dr. Moali:
https://oasis2care.clientsecure.me/request/service

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