The Complex Trauma Podcast

Why does connection feel so hard after complex trauma?
You want closeness, but when someone gets too close, you pull away.
You want support, but "I'm fine" comes out before you've even thought about it.
You want to trust people, yet asking for help, receiving kindness, or staying present during conflict can feel surprisingly difficult.
If you've ever wondered why relationships feel so complicated after childhood trauma or emotional neglect, this episode is for you.
Today, we're exploring how your earliest relationships taught your nervous system what to expect from connection and why those expectations can continue shaping your adult relationships long after childhood is over.
Rather than focusing on attachment styles we'll look at the relational experiences that teach us whether it's safe to have needs, depend on others, receive care, repair after conflict, and be fully ourselves in relationship.
We'll also talk about:
 Why receiving help can feel uncomfortable 
 Hyper-independence and why depending on others feels so risky 
 Why conflict can feel like the end of the relationship 
 People-pleasing and the fear of authenticity 
 The difference between managing relationships and actually experiencing them 
 Why you can still love people who hurt you 
 The difference between love and emotional capacity 
 Grieving the relationship you needed but may never have 
 How healing happens through new relational experiences 
If you've ever felt like your nervous system wants connection while another part of you is pulling away, I hope this episode helps you understand why.
Thanks for listening to The Complex Trauma Podcast!
Be sure to follow, share and give us a review on your favorite podcast platform.
Follow on Instagram: @sarahherstichlcsw 
Follow on TikTok: @sarahherstichlcsw
Learn more about EMDR & trauma therapy in Pennsylvania with Reclaim Therapy
This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended as a substitute for professional medical, psychological, or nutritional advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
Remember, I'm a therapist, but I'm not your therapist. Nothing in this podcast is meant to replace actual therapy or treatment. If you're in crisis or things feel really unsafe right now, please reach out to someone. You can call 988 for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, text them, or head to your nearest ER.
The views expressed by the host and guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organizations or institutions. Reliance on any information provided by this podcast is solely at your own risk.

What is the real impact of growing up with emotionally immature parents? Dr. Lindsay Gibson, author of the bestselling Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents, joins the show to explain what it costs a child over decades, and how to parent differently.
In this conversation, we get into:
What actually makes a parent emotionally immature
Why the love can be real and the harm can be real at the same time
What this can cost a child over years, including a shaken sense of trust in their own perception of reality
What a healthy relationship with an emotionally immature parent can look like in adulthood
The fear so many carry, that we'll become our parents, and why Lindsay says that fear itself might be a good sign
The four essential jobs of parenting: protection, nurturance, guidance, and limits
Her seven parental mindsets for maturity, and the chapter she calls The Absolutes
Dr. Gibson's new book, How to Raise an Emotionally Mature Child, is out now. Order a copy on Amazon or Barnes and Noble
Find her at lindsaycgibson.com and on Instagram @dr.lindsaygibson.
Thanks for listening to The Complex Trauma Podcast!
Be sure to follow, share and give us a review on your favorite podcast platform.
Follow on Instagram: @sarahherstichlcsw 
Follow on TikTok: @sarahherstichlcsw
Learn more about EMDR & trauma therapy in Pennsylvania with Reclaim Therapy
This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended as a substitute for professional medical, psychological, or nutritional advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
Remember, I'm a therapist, but I'm not your therapist. Nothing in this podcast is meant to replace actual therapy or treatment. If you're in crisis or things feel really unsafe right now, please reach out to someone. You can call 988 for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, text them, or head to your nearest ER.
The views expressed by the host and guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organizations or institutions. Reliance on any information provided by this podcast is solely at your own risk.

If you've ever caught yourself wondering who you actually are underneath the anxiety, the people pleasing, or the version of you that shows up to keep everyone else comfortable, this episode is for you.
I break down what a sense of self actually is, why complex trauma gets in the way of building one, and what it looks like to start forming it now, as an adult. That means looking at three capacities trauma tends to disrupt: knowing yourself, expressing yourself, and experiencing yourself, and a few grounded, body-based ways to start reconnecting with each one.
In this episode:
What a sense of self actually is, and why it's built through experience, not something you're born with fully formed
Why survival responses like fight, flight, freeze, or fawning aren't fixed personality traits, they're predictions your nervous system learned to keep you safe
The three capacities complex trauma most often disrupts: knowing yourself, expressing yourself, and experiencing yourself
Why healing this is often less about finding yourself and more about forming yourself
Thanks for listening to The Complex Trauma Podcast!
Be sure to follow, share and give us a review on your favorite podcast platform.
Follow on Instagram: @sarahherstichlcsw 
Follow on TikTok: @sarahherstichlcsw
Learn more about EMDR & trauma therapy in Pennsylvania with Reclaim Therapy
This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended as a substitute for professional medical, psychological, or nutritional advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
Remember, I'm a therapist, but I'm not your therapist. Nothing in this podcast is meant to replace actual therapy or treatment. If you're in crisis or things feel really unsafe right now, please reach out to someone. You can call 988 for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, text them, or head to your nearest ER.
The views expressed by the host and guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organizations or institutions. Reliance on any information provided by this podcast is solely at your own risk.

Sometimes a hobby amplifies whatever relationship your nervous system has with uncertainty.
If you've ever found yourself staring at a blank page, putting off a creative project, or feeling tense doing something that's supposed to be relaxing, this episode is for you.
Today we're exploring why perfectionism can turn creativity into a performance, how complex trauma changes our relationship with uncertainty, and why your hobbies may feel more like a test than a source of joy.
We'll talk about the connection between self-worth and perfectionism, predictive processing, why healing in relationships doesn't always translate to creative expression, and gentle somatic practices to help your nervous system reconnect with curiosity and play.
Whether your "painting" is art, writing, dancing, cooking, starting a business, or trying something new, this episode will help you understand why perfectionism runs much deeper than wanting to get it right.
It might just be your nervous system trying to make sure you still belong.
Thanks for listening to The Complex Trauma Podcast!
Be sure to follow, share and give us a review on your favorite podcast platform.
Follow on Instagram: @sarahherstichlcsw 
Follow on TikTok: @sarahherstichlcsw
Learn more about EMDR & trauma therapy in Pennsylvania with Reclaim Therapy
This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended as a substitute for professional medical, psychological, or nutritional advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
Remember, I'm a therapist, but I'm not your therapist. Nothing in this podcast is meant to replace actual therapy or treatment. If you're in crisis or things feel really unsafe right now, please reach out to someone. You can call 988 for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, text them, or head to your nearest ER.
The views expressed by the host and guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organizations or institutions. Reliance on any information provided by this podcast is solely at your own risk.

If you've ever wondered why insight alone hasn't been enough to heal your trauma, this episode is your answer. We're going all the way back to fundamentals with a real somatic therapy 101, covering what somatic therapy actually is, how the nervous system holds onto trauma, and why healing from CPTSD requires more than just understanding your story.
In this episode, we cover:
Why trauma is a biological response, not just a psychological one (and what that means for your healing)
The actual definition of somatic therapy, and the myths the internet keeps getting wrong
A quick look at nervous system states: ventral vagal, sympathetic, and dorsal vagal, and why they matter for complex trauma specifically
What your window of tolerance is, and why it can narrow over time
Titration and pendulation: how somatic therapists help your body approach painful material safely
How parts work (Internal Family Systems) connects directly to your nervous system states
Why EMDR is a somatic therapy, not just "the eye movement thing"
A nuanced conversation about The Body Keeps the Score and where current research agrees and pushes back
Whether you're a trauma survivor trying to understand your own healing, or a fellow therapist looking for a clear, clinically grounded refresher, this episode is built to meet you where you are.
Mentioned in this episode:
Fawning as a Trauma Response episode
Inner Child Healing and Reparenting episode
Thanks for listening to The Complex Trauma Podcast!
Be sure to follow, share and give us a review on your favorite podcast platform.
Follow on Instagram: @sarahherstichlcsw 
Follow on TikTok: @sarahherstichlcsw
Learn more about EMDR & trauma therapy in Pennsylvania with Reclaim Therapy
This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended as a substitute for professional medical, psychological, or nutritional advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
Remember, I'm a therapist, but I'm not your therapist. Nothing in this podcast is meant to replace actual therapy or treatment. If you're in crisis or things feel really unsafe right now, please reach out to someone. You can call 988 for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, text them, or head to your nearest ER.
The views expressed by the host and guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organizations or institutions. Reliance on any information provided by this podcast is solely at your own risk.