Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

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Tom is off this week, so Christina is joined by the one and only Ian Fidance, host of Ian Do on YouTube, on the road every week for the rest of the year, tickets at https://IanFidance.com. Ian arrives with flowers and a full divorce care package to usher Christina into the dating world, which leads to a conversation about the sleazebag starter kit he should be selling on tour, the darts she's allowed to rip now, and the gout-into-kidney-stones saga that put Ian on a Montreal hotel floor an hour before a taping.

Then it's clip time: the horny cowboy is back with tips nobody asked for, a long-overdue update on Tony Johns and his homeless era, the whistling man who has genuinely figured out life, and a piss gadget that raises real questions. Ian pitches the only logical next step, move every cool guy into one house, with Christina as the RA handing out chores and taking away privileges.

Also: a spy explains how important mouth stuff is in espionage, Christina finds out what dating requires in 2026 versus 2005, the suitor hotline delivers three voicemails and one very promising mechanic named Chris, Ian gets choke slammed at AEW, and a QVC host says something beautiful without realizing it. Enjoy!

Your Mom’s House Ep. 875

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Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro00:02:01 - The Divorce Care Package00:04:41 - Ian's Gout Turned Into Kidney Stones00:07:54 - Opening Clip: The Horny Cowboy Rides Again00:15:08 - Tony Johns Update00:21:37 - Ralph The Whistler Update00:26:25 - Clip: Pissing Gadget00:27:01 - The YMH Cool Guy House00:30:51 - Clip: Russian Spy Tips00:36:30 - The Horny Hotline00:43:32 - Ian Do00:44:31 - TikToks00:49:35 - Wrap Up

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This week, Tom is joined by the property owner himself, Yannis Pappas, whose special Property Owner is on YouTube now and new episodes of History Hyenas with Chrissy D out every week. They open on the underrated power of a compliment from a Philadelphia homeless man, the tier list of who compliments best, and why "you're taller than I thought" both feels great and is a little insulting.

From there it's El Chapo's vitamins and the corpses he lined his driveway with, Vlad the Impaler's welcome mat, which comic could start a cult, the CIA-adjacent Manson doc that Tom actually buys, the man who survived Hiroshima and Nagasaki, and a lone plane crash survivor who walked out of the fireball scrolling his phone. Plus RFK Jr.'s gag reflex, the bear he dumped in Central Park after a long day of falcon hunting, and whether autism is just humans upgrading for the AI age.

Things get real when the guys compare notes on their dads one a Korean War lieutenant who said you can't pin a medal on a dead guy, and the other a Vietnam lieutenant who figured out at 72 that the war might have affected him. Then Tom introduces Yannis to the great Pastor Manning of Harlem, and the man goes off on jobs, doo doo, Doctor King, Jay-Z, Fat Joe, and one lesbo jihadist wife, and mayor with a free bus ride plan. Also: Kanye's catchiest work, some horrible or hilarious clips, street dentistry in India, and a free commercial for ATX Hood Driver. Enjoy!

Your Mom’s House Ep. 874

https://tomsegura.com/tourhttps://christinap.com/https://store.ymhstudios.comhttps://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast

Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro00:00:24 - Yannis Pappas Gets Complimented By The Homeless00:09:31 - Which Comic Could Start A Cult?00:16:55 - The Man Who Survived Hiroshima AND Nagasaki00:21:44 - Opening Clip: Move With Urgency00:27:35 - RFK Jr. The Throat Goat00:30:48 - Our Dads Came Home From War Different00:38:34 - Yannis Meets Pastor Manning Of Harlem00:49:16 - Mamdani's Free Bus Rides00:53:52 - Kanye's Hitler Song Was Kind Of A Banger00:57:06 - Bad Thoughts01:03:00 - Horrible Or Hilarious01:15:03 - Terror Screams vs. Pain Screams01:16:38 - ATX Driver01:17:58 - Closing Song - "Moose Soup" by R Patttz

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Go check out Joe DeRosa's "I Never Promised You A Rose Garden" special now on Netflix!

This week, Christina P holds down the Mommy Dome with one of your new stepdads, Joe DeRosa, whose Netflix special I Never Promised You a Rose Garden is streaming now! They open with a man who hand-washes his underwear and dries it in the microwave, which spirals into a briefs vs. boxers debate, Joe's 24-hour road-clothing system, and Christina's divorce-year regimen: ripping darts, Florida-style white wine, thin crust Domino's every day, and depression-eating full KFC family buckets while Joe defends the biscuits.

Joe also answers for his viral Madonna rant, and the two get into how stars should age gracefully, Phil Collins' office chair, Axl Rose's throne, Iggy Pop climbing out of a coffin at Coachella, Catherine Deneuve, Cyndi Lauper, and the de-aged Robert De Niro kicking scene in The Irishman.

Then the real business: finding Christina a new man. The candidates include an asexual lawyer running for California Secretary of State, inmates filming prison dating videos, and the brand-new horny hotline, where suitors like Terry, the cat guy, depressed Justin from Pennsylvania, and front-runner John the Poet make their case. Christina also opens her DMs to review the avalanche of offers that followed her TMZ announcement. Plus teeth-fixing barters, a long tongue in menacing red light, Big Al's pool sandwiches, and one well-manicured goodnight guy who restores their faith in humanity. Plus: Kevin Smith universe friendships, You've Got Mail vs. Sleepless in Seattle, High Fidelity and record store dreams, and Joe's rules for approaching the freshly divorced. Enjoy!

Your Mom’s House Ep. 873

https://tomsegura.com/tourhttps://christinap.com/https://store.ymhstudios.comhttps://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast

Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro00:06:49 - Opening Clip: Microwave Underwear Guy00:17:16 - Weed, Daily Domino's & Sadboi KFC00:23:26 - Carb Fights & The New Mexico Chipotle Story00:29:43 - Madonna, Phil Collins, Iggy Pop, & De-Aging00:39:12 - Danny Elfman, Linda Perry & Joe's Sitcom Cut Story00:42:48 - The Asexual Attorney00:48:40 - Gamer vs. Silly Gamer Clip00:50:24 - Prison Suitors: Inmate Dating Videos00:58:22 - The Horny Hotline: Courting Christina01:04:18 - High Fidelity, You've Got Mail & Record Stores Joe Dreams About01:15:06 - John The Poet01:17:12 - What Actually Matters In A Partner According To Joe DeRosa01:30:02 - More Hotline Calls01:32:51 - Christina Opens Her DMs01:44:32 - Christina's TikTok Curations01:53:51 - Wrap Up

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Well, Tom is back in the Mommy Dome for the first time since the news, and longtime friend Ryan Sickler is in the chair with him. Tom addresses the divorce head-on: why he and Christina have been recording separately for months, getting the TMZ call, and why nobody "made" Christina go first. He also opens up about the state of his DMs, which include a kindergarten teacher looking to "help each other out" and Ryan's own mother, who, Ryan promises, means Tom can get dicked down in Delaware any time.

Tom then opens the show with a dude declaring that anyone who doesn't drink their coffee black is gay, which sends Tom and Ryan into the world of men fighting the internet: a guy debunking AI edits of himself kissing dudes, Daddy Lalogon begging TikTok to stop calling him daddy, and Pastor Manning back at the pulpit with a fresh "get a job" sermon (plus the Suede remix) while the guys debate how many people are actually in that church.

Tom also pitches Ryan on the next dads-and-kids trip: a family resort in the Philippines where the giant Hulk statue's fully detailed dick doubles as a pool fountain, and the owner cannot stop posting slow-tilt reveals of it. Tom develops a whole theory about the man's artistic vision and wants to send a YMH field team to get more details. They also spiral into junkyard Instagram where a guy solving car problems with half-sticks of dynamite and another launching full propane tanks out of a cannon. Plus some horrible or hilarious clips and a debate about Catholicism for the ages. Enjoy!

Your Mom’s House Ep. 872

https://tomsegura.com/tourhttps://christinap.com/https://store.ymhstudios.comhttps://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast

Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro00:00:19 - Tom Addresses The Divorce00:11:04 - Opening Clip: Milk In Your Coffee00:17:06 - Not Gay It's AI00:23:18 - Sickler Meets Pastor Manning00:35:37 - Summer Trip & Guys Blowing Shit Up Online00:47:30 - The Hulk Is Packing01:00:19 - Clip: Relapse Blame01:01:00 - Horrible Or Hilarious01:07:50 - Battle With Catholicism01:16:10 - Crashing Zoom Meetings01:19:41 - Ryan Sickler's Special01:22:15 - Closing Song - "Daddy Lalogon" by Stoner Stag

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I want to talk about divorce. Christina P holds down the Mommy Dome with Duncan Trussell for the heaviest episode in show history, the divorce episode. Christina addresses it head-on: yes, she and Tom are divorcing after 20 years, no, you don't need to pick teams, and yes, Mommy is ripping darts, drinking wine, and surviving on one Domino's thin crust a day. From there she and Duncan spiral through cancer, TMZ breaking the story while she was in a London pub with Ari Shaffir, and Duncan's own jaw-dropping family divorce story involving a priest and a jammed shotgun.

Then they unpack the International Dick Alert and open some DMs: the guy sending "hey" with one extra Y each time, a Puerto Rican gentleman with a generous offer, the PetSmart employee confusing ferrets and flashlights, aquarium romantic Yung Tang Tang, a Brit promising to beat her vaginal fluid into firm egg whites, and a poly couple charging a $250,000 application fee. A suitor hotline is also officially in the works.

They also hit Burning Man hygiene, spray tan confessions, and a trip down memory lane through an 80s divorce boom including latchkey summers, dads' apartment complexes, frozen hot dogs, dancing with sailors at the Beef and Barrel, and the porn tapes that raised them. Too late for you, too late for the lamb.

Your Mom’s House Ep. 871

https://tomsegura.com/tourhttps://christinap.com/https://store.ymhstudios.comhttps://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast

Chapters 00:00:00 - Emotional Intro00:04:55 - Opening Clip: Bobby Lee Swoops In00:13:52 - The TMZ International Dick Alert00:19:31 - The Shadow Of Divorce Trauma00:30:05 - Duncan's Parents, the Priest & the Shotgun00:42:38 - What's Real: Grief, Friends & Love00:59:07 - Single Gal Questions, Horny Hotline, & Reading DM's01:15:48 - Pet Smart Ferret Guy & More Suitors01:39:06 - Christina's Curations02:03:10 - Self Pleasure In Spray Tan Booth02:07:11 - Old School Porn At Dad's Place02:17:57 - Latchkey Kids02:27:37 - Trauma Bonding02:33:51 - Final Thoughts

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